Narcissistic Love Bombing. Don’t Get Fooled!

Narcissistic Love Bombing.
Don’t Get Fooled!

By Therapist: Shannon Petrovich LCSW

Video courtesy of the Therapist Talks YouTube channel

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What is a Covert Narcissist?

What is a Covert Narcissist?

By Therapist: Shannon Petrovich LCSW

Video is courtesy of the Therapist Talks YouTube channel

Sociopaths, Psychopaths, and Malignant Narcissists

Sociopaths,
Psychopaths,
and Malignant Narcissists.

By Therapist: Shannon Petrovich LCSW

Video courtesy of the Therapist Talks YouTube channel

A Malignant Narcissist and An Empathic Person equals A Tragically Perfect Match

A Malignant Narcissist
and An Empathic Person;
A Tragically Perfect Match.

By Therapist: Shannon Petrovich LCSW

Video is courtesy of the Therapist Talks YouTube channel

Narcissistic Supply; Don’t Be a Victim to the Vampire!

Narcissistic Supply.
Don’t Be a Victim to the Vampire!

By Therapist: Shannon Petrovich LCSW

Video is courtesy of the Therapist Talks YouTube channel

Trauma Bonding with a Narcissist or Other Abuser. 10 Strategies to Get Free!

This site had been setup to try and help, by being a resource of information. WordPress.com hosts this site for me, at no charge. The advertising on this site is put there by WordPress, to help cover some of their costs. Because the site is hosted by WordPress for free, I am not allowed to place any advertising .

I believe that if one is trying to help, then one should not try to gain some benefit from providing said help. I “know” the damage a Narcissist can do to an Empathetic Human Being. I have attracted Narcs all my life. Why? Because I care and will try to help others. I have crossed paths with all sorts of Narcissists. They share many of the Red Flags.

Even with my experience I was unable to pickup any Red Flags from a new employer until I started working, at a new job. This Narc was totally Malignant. He kept a baseball bat in his office (definitely not to play Baseball) and bragged about it. Heck playing Baseball would mean that he could sweat and mess up his of so incredible hair (his words)!!! He would not go swimming for that same reason and made sure everyone in the office knew.  I had crossed paths with malignant Narcs whom I thought could be dangerous. This new Boss not only could be, but I felt that he would be dangerous. He also had a constant need to be the center of attention. Held functionally pointless meetings daily so he play the role of King.

I knew enough that there was no point of putting myself through the pain and mental anguish which would happen if I stayed. IMHO the best solution to dealing with a Narcissist is to GO NO Contact, especially a totally Malignant Narc. I came in on the Monday of my 3 rd week. Cleaned up the computers and quit – after 2 weeks and gave no notice – I just walked out before the Boss arrived. That Boss was likely as close to a Psychopath as I will ever come across.

In my younger years I knew some Bikers. One became a close friend. He literally scared the other Bikers. but did not scare me as I got know him, his wife and kids. It was amazing watching Ted with his daughters. Sorry I digress. That new Boss scared me because one had no clue and I felt there was no limit to what he could do. The thing that upset me the most is that I had not picked up on any Red Flags, until I started to work there. My 2nd week was a real eye opener when his Mask came off.

I bring this up because I feel that there is a decent foundation of information found on this site and as such I have not posted much. Looking for something else, I recently came across some incredible videos created by a Therapist about Narcissists and how to Deal with them. She created the videos to try to help. I was blown away. She has her name on the videos, but does not have any contact info. She does not ask for anything. She does not ask people to send money to fund the video site (as more than a few people do). She did it because she cares and will get no personally benefit. She also states in each video to share the material so that others may be helped. I personally believe that we are members of the same family called Human Beings and should try to help each. Yes, I’m an empath, and I really believe that helping others is one of the most important things in life. The others things are sharing Love and Forgiveness.

I will start to share Shannon Petrovich’s videos on this site. I firmly believe that “Going No Contact” is the only viable solution. But, it is easier to type that, than actually Going No Contact. Trauma Bonding is very real. The Narcissist’s Victim has also been isolated from any form of support, from Family or Friends. Narcs will demand that you get their permission to meet with members of your Family or Friends. By keeping you isolated, makes it easier to “Totally Control” you. Being kept isolated deepens the Trauma Bonding, making it Very Very hard to Go No Contact. This video explains the situation.

Video is courtesy of the Therapist Talks YouTube channel.

Narcissists Do Not Love. They Hold Hostages!

Narcissists Do Not Love.

They Hold Hostages!

This quote by: Shannon Petrovich LCSW

Narcissists Do Not Love. They Hold Hostages! Quote by: Shannon Petrovich LCSW

Please feel free to share this “PNG” image file. In Windows, just place your cursor over the image above and then click your right mouse button. A menu will pop up. Next scroll your mouse cursor over the line “Save image as” to highlight it and then click the left mouse button. That will save the image file to your PC. You can then upload the image file, where you feel it might help others.

Divorcing the Narcissist – Full Seminar with Sam Vaknin, Sara Davison and Richard Grannon

Divorcing the Narcissist – Full Seminar

with Sam Vaknin, Sara Davison and Richard Grannon

Video is courtesy of the RICHARD GRANNON SPARTANLIFECOACH YouTube channel.

 

Ex-Boyfriend Arranged Acid Attack

Click on this link to visit The Sun news website to read their news post titled: “ACID HORROR Woman who was scarred for life when her ex-boyfriend hired a hitman to throw acid on her recalls watching her skin ‘drip to the floor“.

Edmundo Fonseca, who threw the acid was told to throw it at her face. He did not. He also said “Sorry” before throwing the acid on Ellie Chessell’s body. In court he stated that he was deceived, because he was told that it was urine which he was to throw.

Ellie’s Ex-Boyfriend Claudio Gouveia, had hired Edmundo to throw the acid after Ellie left the two-year old relationship. She went Go No Contact to the point of moving to a different city. Unfortunately her Ex-Boyfriend had refused to give Ellie her laptop and cell phone. She believes that he was able to track her down and monitor her using the cell phone.

Video is courtesy of The Morning YouTube channel

Please be careful out there. Ellie took the best option by trying to Go No Contact. Disordered Individuals can attack when they lose their source of Narcissistic Supply. If there was any violence during the relationship, please speak to your local Law Enforcement, even if you had not reported the violence when it had happened.

At least in this case the Ex-Boyfriend Claudio Gouveia was charged and convicted with Attempted Murder and was sentenced to 12 years in jail.

Ellie stated she now suffers from PTSD and is getting treatment. He body will be forever scarred. Thankfully the acid was not thrown directly in her face.

If you decide to Go No Contact, then be prepared to Expect the Unexpected from the Narcissist.

8 Red Flags to Watch for

In a healthy relationship, partners naturally try to be there for each other. In the mind of a Disordered Individual, you are there to serve their own needs and your needs do not matter.

Video is courtesy of the Be The Light YouTube channel

In a healthy relationship there can be Open Dialague between the two partners. In a relationship with a Disordered Individual their monologue is what is important. They do NOT care to listen to what you have to say.

I came across a great article which discusses what I would call 8 Red Flags to watch out for.

Click on this link to visit the Lessons Learned in Life website to read their article titled: “Watch out: If a Man Does These 8 Things, He Doesn’t Truly Value You“.

You’ll Never Survive Working for a Narcissistic Boss

The Optimum Talent website’s Optimum Talks Blog has a superb post by Frances Sardone, titled: “You’ll Never Survive Working for a Narcissistic Leader – Here’s Why“.The last line in their post really struck home for me. It was: “Can you work for a Narcissist? No, you can’t. No one can and remain healthy.“.

I have read posts on websites about working with a Narcissist Boss, which implied that you can change the Boss. Sorry, but I strongly disagree. IMHO, you cannot fix that which is hardwired differently in the brain of the Narcissist. Many Trained and very Experienced Therapists state that they cannot change a Narcissist. Good Luck getting a Narcissist to go to a Therapist asking for Help. The one course of action which an employee of a Narcissistic Boss, which works, is to Go No Contact – Quit without notice and never come back.

Click on this link to visit the Optimum Talent website to read their excellent article titled: “You’ll Never Survive Working for a Narcissistic Leader – Here’s Why“.

 

How a Narcissistic Boss Causes Stress and Burnout by Dr. Hamlin

Dr. Hamlin discusses How a Narcissistic Boss Causes Stress and Burnout. He also offers a few tips for how to cope with a Narcissistic Boss, so that you can protect yourself.

Video is courtesy of the Steps for Change YouTube channel

7 Emotional Manipulation Strategies which Narcissists use to confuse conversations

Sharing the Truth of the Narcissist’s actions and you may think you are suddenly in episode of the Twilight Zone. Your reality will not be accepted by the Narcissist. This can occur within a personal relationship and also in a work environment with a Narcissistic Boss.

If you create a Narcissistic Injury, then lookout as the Narcissist will twist things to Keep the Focus OFF OF The FACTS which you spoke about. They will switch to talking about and accuse you of things totally unrelated to what the original discussion was about. How dare you question the Narcissist. 

Video is courtesy of the Michele Lee Nieves Coaching YouTube channel

Toxic Workplace & Narcissist Boss – Dr. Karlyn Borysenko

Toxic Workplace & Narcissist Boss” is a video of an interview with Dr. Karlyn Borysenko, who is an Organizational Psychologist and Author and Performance Coach. She has made presentations at the South by Southwest® (SXSW®) Conference & Festival.

Video is courtesy of the Copeland Coaching YouTube channel

What it is like working for a Malignant Narcissist Boss

I happened on this article which is well written. She did not initially see that her Boss was a Narcissist. When her eyes were opened, she realized that he was not just Narcissistic, but was a rather Malignant Narcissist.

She started to do research on Narcissism. Thankfully she had the support of family and friends, who kept suggesting that she quit her job. Finally she quit. She did not say anything to the Narcissist Boss. She quit and went Go No Contact.

I found this to be a very good real life example of what it can be like, when one finds themselves working for a Malignant Narcissist Boss.

Click on this line to visit the catherinedeveny.com website to read her article titled: “

See You Next Tuesday! Quitting the toxic boss – Jennifer Lim

Narcissistic Injury and the attacks which follow

The DSM 5 manual defines Narcissistic Injury as: “vulnerability in self-esteem which makes narcissistic people very sensitive to ‘injury’ from criticism or defeat. Although they may not show it outwardly, criticism may haunt these individuals and may leave them feeling humiliated, degraded, hollow and empty. They react with disdain, rage, or defiant counterattack.”.

Click on this link to visit the Psychology Today website to read their article titled: “The Destructive Force of Narcissistic Injury“.

Video is courtesy of the DD Morris YouTube channel

Narcissistic Injury was first used by Sigmund Freud back in the 1920’s. A Narcissistic Injury occurs when the Narcissist’s importance is brought into question.

Click on this link to visit the WikiPedia page to read their post titled: “Narcissistic Rage and Narcissistic Injury“.

A Narcissistic Injury can also occur when a person does not accommodate a Narcissist’s insatiable need for constant Admiration and Praise.

Click on this link to visit the PsychCentral website to read their article titled: “Narcissistic Injuries: What They Are and How to Protect Yourself from Them“.

Narcissistic Personality Disorder – Psychology of Demons