The Narcissist’s Cycle. What different Sources of Narcissistic Supply offer to the Narcissist.

Video courtesy of the From These Ashes YouTube channel

Different kind of video. She is a victim of a Narcissist. That gives her insight into Narcissists. Interesting explanation what different Sources of Narcissistic Supply offer to the Narcissist

Her closing message is that Narcissists do not change and it is well worth remembering.

Excerpt after the Angels from Healed, A Memoir (Part II)

After the Angels:  I love talking about the angels I saw during surgery and how they helped facilitate healing of my body.  I uploaded an excerpt from my memoir in progress in an earlier post and s…

Source: Excerpt after the Angels from Healed, A Memoir (Part II)

Note from the Admin of Uniquely Narcissistic:
This is not a post about religion. Tricia was clinically dead but returned back to life. It is a post which I believe could help those who have been Used, Abused and Traumatized in their life and continue to suffer because of that. I believe that learning that you are “Loved” could help such individuals to start to heal their wounds. Plse view Tricia’s video in the next post (the post just above this one) and you will have a better idea of what I am trying to convey. It’s about Psychology, not religion. She also shares some of her life journey and discusses certain people she had crossed paths with. Her sharing her experience is a gift, for us all.

Quote ” Narcissists see themselves as being Perfection itself…So why try to change that which is already PERFECT?”

Quote " Narcissists see themselves as being Perfection itself...So why try to change that which is already PERFECT?" by uniquelynarcissistic.wordpress.com

Quote:Narcissists see themselves as being Perfection itself…So why try to change that which is already PERFECT?

 

Copyright 2016 https://uniquelynarcissistic.wordpress.com
Feel free to share under Creative Common License Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International.

Place your mouse cursor on the image. Then right Click and then choose Save Image As.

Creative Commons License
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International License.

Stepfather jailed for 100 years for repeatedly throwing his three-year-old stepdaughter in hotel pool and drowning her

Video is courtesy of the BBC NEWS AUDIO YouTube channel

An adult can escape from an abusive relationship. A three year child cannot.

While her mother slept in a hotel room, her Step Father took the little three year down to the hotel swimming pool. He then proceeded to in effect torture the three year old, by repeatedly throwing her into the pool. She could “not swim”. In another scene he has entered the pool and is shown, in security camera video, to be holding the child underwater while calmly watching the child struggle.

Someone does not do something this cruel out of the blue. It is my opinion that this guy has had practice. Possibly starting with torturing and killing small animals in his youth.

No feeling for the suffering of the child. It’s possible that he may have enjoyed watching her struggle for her life. Other hotel guests left the pool when this started.

In my opinion the video shows the stark reality of a Psychopath. It’s not often that such actions are captured on video.

This happened about 1 year ago. He just got convicted.

There are more videos on YouTube. There is also another video of a Father trying to drown his two year old daughter. This in my opinion may be related to Narcissists being Misogynists. Both of these guys are very disordered (to put it kindly). Misogyny may also extend to Psychopaths, not just to Narcissists and they take their hatred of women out on their daughters and stepdaughters. Click on this link to view a prior post written by Dr. Sam Vaknin about Narcissists being “Misogynists and women haters”.

Had this child survived her ordeal, she would have been severely traumatized. This would have damaged an innocent child for her entire life. Had she not drowned, I believe that the abuse would have continued and escalated.

Folks please be very careful with whom you get into a relationship with, especially if you have a child.

Dear Narcissist, “this feeling of being nothing that often dominates me… comes largely from your influence.”. Quote by Franz Kafka

Quote "Dear Narcissist, this feeling of being nothing that often dominate me...comes largely from your influence." by Franz Kafka

Quote:Dear Narcissist, “this feeling of being nothing that often dominates me… comes largely from your influence.”.” Quote by Franz Kafka from his “Letter to his Father”.

 

Copyright 2016 https://uniquelynarcissistic.wordpress.com
Feel free to share under Creative Common License Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International.

Place your mouse cursor on the image. Then right Click and then choose Save Image As.

Creative Commons License
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International License.

Will the Narcissist ever forget me?

 

Quote "Will the Narcissist ever forget me? Yes, if you are not a highly valued source of Narcissistic Supply! Their memory of you will fade soon after the Love Bombing stops. Mind you, this will occur long before the Narcissist decides to walk out the door and out of your life. While they Love Bomb their new and better Source of Narcissistic Supply, they will keep you around as a backup." by uniquelynarcissistic.wordpress.com

Quote:Will the Narcissist ever forget me? Yes, if you are not a highly valued source of Narcissistic Supply! Their memory of you will face soon after the Love Bombing stops. Mind you, this will occur long before the Narcissist decides to walk out the door and out of your life. While they Love Bomb their new and better Source of Narcissistic Supply, they will keep you around as a backup.

 

Copyright 2016 https://uniquelynarcissistic.wordpress.com
Feel free to share under Creative Common License Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International.

Place your mouse cursor on the image. Then right Click and then choose Save Image As.

Creative Commons License
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International License.

Save

Quote “The behind your back Smear Campaign, is a Narcissist’s Specialty.”

Quote "The behind your back Smear Campaign, is a Narcissist's Specialty." by uniquelynarcissistic.wordpress.com

Narcissist Quote:The behind your back Smear Campaign, is a Narcissist’s Specialty.

 

Copyright 2016 https://uniquelynarcissistic.wordpress.com
Feel free to share under Creative Common License Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International.

Place your mouse cursor on the image. Then right Click and then choose Save Image As.

Creative Commons License
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International License.

Save

Abysmal Parenting creates both Narcissists and Codependents via Infant and Childhood Trauma. A Traumatized Individual is attracted to another Traumatized Individual.

Infant Attachment Trauma caused by the Birth Mother or by the infant being given away to be raised by someone other than the Birth Mother (Grandparents or adopted out) can result in a Cluster-B Disordered Individual such as a Narcissist.

Childhood Trauma (later form of Attachment Trauma) caused by one or both parents can result in a Codependent Individual. One or more of the parents could be Cluster-B Disordered.

I am of the opinion that said Individuals (Narcissist or Codependent) are created (not born – ie not genetic) because of variations of Attachment Trauma inflicted on them via Abysmal Parenting.

John Bradshaw’s work raised the awareness of the concept of the Injured Inner Child. I have spoken to people with high levels of Narcissistic Traits, about their childhood. It was like I was talking to a different individual. even their vocal characteristic changed. I have crossed paths with Narcissists and have paid the price. Yet I still feel sorry for them. In my opinion it is not their fault that they are the way they are. The same for folks with Codependent Traits.

Keeping this site going I have again come full circle back to Attachment Trauma. I was reminded of that today while researching the website of a San Francisco Bay area Complex PTSD Therapist. I have to get in touch with him, to see if I can share some of his material on this site.

Taking my theory further, a relationship between a Narcissist and a Codependent could result in further Trauma. The Codependent could develop PTSD (or Complex PTSD if the relationship had been a long term one). The Narcissist could also suffer Trauma in the form of Narcissist Injury (Abandonment Trauma), from the loss of their valued Source of Narcissistic Supply. In the extreme, the Narcissist could attempt Suicide because of that Trauma and injury (I have witnessed this with Somatic Narcissists). Both types of individuals were created due to Trauma and when combined into a relationship both end up creating more Trauma. The Codependent could also develop Trauma Bonding if the relationship becomes abusive, and cannot leave.

Narcissists are attracted to Codependents.

Codependents are attracted to Narcissists.

Maybe the Injured Inner Child (see Alice Miller’s book titled : “The Drama of The Gifted Child and John Bradshaw’s books and videos about the Inner Child) of each type of individual can somehow pickup on the injured Inner Child in the other type of individual. The Injured Inner Child could be the source of the attraction between Codependents and Narcissists.

The common theme in the above is Trauma. The destructive Domino cascade is initiated by Extremely Poor to non-existent Parenting. Another area where our Educational Systems have failed Society. How many of you reading this, have had courses which detailed Great Parenting?

The most important role that a Human can have is to become a Great Parent. Yet we get zero formal training. I have had to take many courses in say Accounting and Statistics which I will “never” use. I have had zero courses detailing how to be a Great Parent. Does this make sense to you???

Over 75 Years Harvard has run a Research Study to learn “What keeps us happy and healthy as we go through life?”.

A Research Study running for a period of 75 years is unheard of. Harvard University has been running such an incredibly long Research Study. The study is helping to answer the question: “What keeps us happy and healthy as we go through life?

In this video, Robert Waldinger, a Harvard psychiatrist, is the 4th ongoing Director of the longest study (75 years and still running) on adult life and happiness, discusses the surprising findings of this Harvard Research Study.

Video is courtesy of the TED Talks YouTube channel

Older couples, in the Study, were recently asked about conflicts and how they resolve them. But couple after couple, could not recall conflicts.

In my opinion, based on the findings from the Harvard Research Study if you want to live a “Long” and “Healthy” and “Happy” life, then stay far away from Cluster-B disordered individuals such as Narcissists, because such disordered individuals lack empathy for others and are unable to share real intimacy with others.

Psychotherapist Terri Cole discusses Traits and Red Flags, to help you tell if you are dating a Narcissist.

Video is courtesy of the Terri Cole YouTube channel

Terri Cole also wrote:

When it comes to being in a relationship with a narcissist, it’s difficult to find any real intimacy because everything is about your functionality in their life. Narcissists can love only on a superficial level. As long as you are doing what they think you are supposed to be doing, all is well (and when i say ‘well’ I mean they get what they want and you stay unsatisfied, unseen and unheard.) The moment you deny them exactly what they want, look out! They will explode, get mean and do just about anything to get you back in line with their plan. If you don’t comply, they will leave.

Actions and conversations with a narcissist all revolve around building them up, even when it’s “about you,” it’s really about them – they get to “show you off to their friends.” That isn’t about you at all. It’s about their ego and how you make them look.

You can learn more about Terri Cole by visiting her website by clicking on this line.

You can also checkout her social Media pages as listed below:
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TerriColeLCS...
Twitter: https://twitter.com/terri_cole
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/terricole/
Pinterest: http://www.pinterest.com/terricoleLCSW/

Terri Cole’s video above, reminded me of a particular Somatic Narcissist that I once had to deal with.

Complex PTSD and its Symptoms.

A revealing video from someone suffering with Complex PTSD.

Video is courtesy of the Cecilia Romero YouTube channel

Quote “Don’t waste words on people who deserve your silence. Sometimes the most powerful thing you can say is nothing at all.” by Mandy Hale

Narcissist Quote “Don’t waste words on people who deserve your silence. Sometimes the most powerful thing you can say is nothing at all.” by Mandy Hale.

This quote nicely explains the reasoning behind going No Contact with that Narcissist.

Source: Patricia on Pinterest saved to Quotes & Thoughts folder

Smear Campaign, a Narcissist’s Specialty.

Narcissists are known for something commonly called “the Smear Campaign“.

They might smile to your face, but behind your back they will run their Smear Campaign against you, to try to destroy you and your reputation.

When you finally learn of the Narcissist’s Smear Campaign it will be too late, as the damage will have already been done.

Video is courtesy of the BA Recovery YouTube channel

Quote “When becoming involved with a Narcissist, always remember that your present situation is not your final destination. The worst is yet to come, especially when the Narcissist switches from Love Bombing to the Discard Phase.”

Quote "When becoming involved with a Narcissist, always remember that your present situation is not your final destination. The worst is yet to come, especially when the Narcissist switches from Love Bombing to the Discard Phase." by uniquelynarcissistic.wordpress.com

Quote:When becoming involved with a Narcissist, always remember that your present situation is not your final destination. The worst is yet to come, especially when the Narcissist switches from Love Bombing to the Discard Phase.”

 

Copyright 2016 https://uniquelynarcissistic.wordpress.com
Feel free to share under Creative Common License Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International.

Place your mouse cursor on the image. Then right Click and then choose Save Image As.

Creative Commons License
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International License.

Quote “How could something that was so real to me have been a lie? How can someone create such a false world and let you happily live in it then turn it upside down. Why the hell did I have to experience that?? How can someone be so cruel?”

Quote:How could something that was so real to me have been a lie? How can someone create such a false world and let you happily live in it then turn it upside down. Why the hell did I have to experience that?? How can someone be so cruel?

Source: Kay Danfield on Piniterest saved to Toxic Relationships with Narcissists folder.

Quote “Dear Narcissist, An amazing change has overcome me. People say that I now seem so happy. It’s all because I no longer have to be around you.”

 

Quote "Dear Narcissist, An amazing change has overcome me. People say that I now seem so happy. It's all because I no longer have to be around you." by uniquelynarcissistic.wordpress.com


Quote:Dear Narcissist, An amazing change has overcome me. People say that I now seem so happy. It’s all because I no longer have to be around you.

Save

Quote “Sometimes giving someone a second chance is like giving them an extra bullet for their gun, because they missed you the first time”

Quote:Sometimes giving someone a second chance is like giving them an extra bullet for their gun, because they missed you the first time


Source: Courtesy of the SimpleReminders.com Facebook page

Quote “If you decide to go No Contact, then be prepared to Expect the Unexpected, from the Narcissist.”

Quote "If you decide to go No Contact, then be prepared to Expect the Unexpected from the Narcissist." by uniquelynarcissistic.wordpress.com

Quote:If you decide to go No Contact, then be prepared to Expect the Unexpected,
from the Narcissist.

 

Copyright 2016 https://uniquelynarcissistic.wordpress.com
Feel free to share under Creative Common License Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International.

Place your mouse cursor on the image. Then right Click and then choose Save Image As.

Creative Commons License
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International License.

Annabel Lee discusses the Smear Campaign which came after she went No Contact with her Narcissist.

Annabel Lee details Smear Campaigns and what happens when you go No Contact with that Narcissist and how she handled the situation.

The Narcissist is unable to keep their mask for long periods of time. Eventually their mask will come off and people will start to notice it. Have patience and play the “Long” game. Narcissist can fool people in the short term, not so much in the long term when their mask slips off too often…

Annabel Lee’s video give you hope. She has unfortunately been there and done that with Narcissists. She is also a proponent of going No Contact.

Video is courtesy of the Annabel Lee YouTube channel

Quote: “When a Narcissist can no longer control you, they will instead try to control how others see you.”

maymay_mcmay5/1/2016 6:19:20 AM

 

Quote:When a Narcissist can no longer control you, they will instead try to control how others see you.

Going No Contact, means the Narcissist can no longer get Narcissistic Supply from you. When that happens, the Narcissist could switch to trying to control how others view you. Never forget that Narcissists work with Stealth, when they start their Smear Campaign behind your back.

Your reputation, especially at a job, is extremely important and as such could become the target of the spiteful Narcissist. After you have dared to Go No Contact with a Narcissist make sure to maintain extra contact with others at your place of work, especially with those in positions higher up the ladder than your job title.

Trying to go No Contact (or as little as possible contact) with a Narcissist could have benefits, but could also create unbelievable problems and issues. There is nothing like finding out that the Narcissist told the people who you report to, that the Narc can’t stand working there because you are there. Of course the Narc forgot to also inform them that the Narc used to constantly tell you that you were oh so Wonderful. The Narcissist could set out to punish you by starting a smear campaign behind your back, when you have the audacity to go as little as possible to No Contact with the Narc.

If you decide to go No Contact, then be prepared to Expect the Unexpected from the Narcissist.

TEDX Talks presents Dr. Helen Riess, an Associate Professor of Psychiatry at Harvard Medical School, discussing research on the Neuroscience of Emotions and Empathy

Dr. Helen Riess is an Associate Professor of Psychiatry at Harvard Medical School. She directs the Empathy & Relational Science Program, conducting unique research on the neuroscience of emotions and empathy, and is Co-Founder, Chief Scientist and Chairman of Empathetics, LLC.

Dr. Helen Riess has devoted her career to research on the Neuroscience and art of the patient-doctor relationship and teaching psychiatry residents and medical students. Her research team conducts translational research based on the Neuroscience of emotions. The effectiveness of Dr. Riess’s Empathy training approach has been demonstrated in several studies including a randomized controlled trial.

This TEDX Talks presentation has many insights into Empathy.

Video is courtesy of the TEDx Talks YouTube channel

Quote “With time I will heal and change, but you will always remain a Narcissist.”

Quote "With time I will heal and change, but you will always remain a Narcissist." by uniquelynarcissistic.wordpress.com

Quote:With time I will heal and change, but you will always remain a Narcissist.

 

Copyright 2016 https://uniquelynarcissistic.wordpress.com
Feel free to share under Creative Common License Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International.

Place your mouse cursor on the image. Then right Click and then choose Save Image As.

Creative Commons License
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International License.

Save