What made you the “perfect” Target of a Narcissist?
Targeting of individuals occurs all the time. We pick our friends, and they clearly are not just anybody.
This video gives some insight into what made you a Dream Target to a Narcissist.
Narcissists do not pick people at random. Christine Louis de Canonville stated something intriguing in her seminar titled “Narcissistic Victim Syndrome….What the heck is that?”. She stated that once you have been “primed” by a Narcissist, then you will attract Narcissists by the boatload. That is a very important point to remember if in the past you had been used and abused by a Narcissist. Other Narcissists can seemingly pick you out a crowd.
I’ve learned two things that Narcissist look for in potential targets. One is empathy. That seems unusual because Narcissist lack empathy themselves, yet they test potential targets to see how much if any empathy the Target displays. How does the target react to a sad story? Coming from a Narcissist it is more than likely that it will be a made up sad story, just to test your reaction.
The 2nd thing that I have learned that Narcissists watch for is “giving”.
Is the potential target a Giver or a Taker? A Narcissist’s interest in you will be triggered, if you give them anything. Even you giving the smallest thing matters. No it does not matter in the way that you might think. Narcissists don’t care about your kind giving heart beyond what he/she might be able to manipulate you into giving to them.
The following is some of the Narcissist’s thought process: “You had unexpectedly brought me something. Hmmm, What else might you give me in the future.? It is very useful to have someone who will give me things.”. Those are the kinds of thoughts which go thru a Narcissist’s mind.
Most of the Narcissists that I have crossed paths with were “Extremely Cheap“. It shows up after the Love Bombing phase is over and they have you hooked. Not just being “extremely Thrifty“, they were “Extremely Cheap“. You the Target, will be doing all the giving and they the Narcissist only know how to do the taking.