This video discusses the differences between the Somatic Female Narcissist and a typical Male Narcissist.
Video is courtesy of the From Surviving To Thriving!! YouTube channel
Somatic Narcissists come across as being Laid back. Somatic Narcs it seems lack education, focus, goals and drive and as such achieve little. They are generally low level employees.
Cerebral Narcissist, on the other hand, do climb high up the Corporate Ladder. They can also cause major problems for the firm. Their focus is on themselves and getting praise from those whom they have classified as “high quality” Narcissistic Supply. They generally have no clue how to motivate a Team and as such can lose really good employees who will quit.
I have crossed paths with Cerebral Narcs who were totally focused on themselves. Every conversation and every meeting included them praising themselves. People further up the ladder had a disdain for them and their further advancement up the Corporate Ladder was blocked. The only ones who could not see this were a couple of Flying Monkeys who would watch the Cerebral Narcs every move and follow and praise him.
Narcissists “need you” to praise and worship their every move. They can suffer Major Narcissistic Injury (potentially suicidal), if their “High Value” source of Narcissistic Supply goes No Contact.
So on one hand Narcissists think that they are Perfect. On the other they “need” others to confirm their “illusion” of perfection. Winners live in the real world. In my opinion, the Abandonment Trauma which created the Narcissist when they were just a Baby, did not create a Winner…
Video is courtesy of the Sam Vaknin YouTube channel
Video is courtesy of the Terri Cole YouTube channel
Terri Cole also wrote:
When it comes to being in a relationship with a narcissist, it’s difficult to find any real intimacy because everything is about your functionality in their life. Narcissists can love only on a superficial level. As long as you are doing what they think you are supposed to be doing, all is well (and when i say ‘well’ I mean they get what they want and you stay unsatisfied, unseen and unheard.) The moment you deny them exactly what they want, look out! They will explode, get mean and do just about anything to get you back in line with their plan. If you don’t comply, they will leave.
Actions and conversations with a narcissist all revolve around building them up, even when it’s “about you,” it’s really about them – they get to “show you off to their friends.” That isn’t about you at all. It’s about their ego and how you make them look.
You can learn more about Terri Cole by visiting her website by clicking on this line.
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Terri Cole’s video above, reminded me of a particular Somatic Narcissist that I once had to deal with.
Video is courtesy of the The Dr. Phil Show YouTube channel
Dr. Phil interviews Ex-Girlfriend Of Man Accused Of Killing, Dismembering Seattle Mom. See how many Red Flags you can pick up. This lady was lucky that she was not isolated during her 6 months or so with that guy.
She said that he was Charming, Witty and Very Smart. How do you spell Cerebral Narcissist? Yet she could tell that there was something about him that was “off”. There was something scary about his eyes. Potentially Malignant? When the mask slips, one gets to see something else, which was lurking behind that mask.
He met the the Seattle Mom (whom he allegedly killed and dismembered) online via an dating site.
Which brings me to an email which I had received from a visitor to this site.
I received an email asking if Narcissists ever change. The writer stated that they were dating people via an internet dating site. They had found Narcissists to be “much more fun” than the “normal” “regular” people.
Yes you can date Narcissists which you meet on an Internet Dating Site. Great way to risk your life, meeting total strangers and one’s whom you prefer to be afflicted with a Cluster-B Disorder like NPD. Hey, you might get to meet your first Psychopath (who could also turn out to be your last).
You may have fun in the beginning.
Read the recent posts about the women who could not leave physically abusive relationships. They all had so much fun – in the very beginning – during the Love Bombing Phase. Listen to how they describe the guy, who ended up physically abusing them consistently after they had been isolated from family and friends. Things changed drastically. They got Black Eyes on a consistent basis. The were kicked down flights of stairs. They had their heads punched repeatedly. Not fun things to go through. Especially if the Narcissist or Cluster-B Disordered Individual can isolate you and make you totally dependent on them. Note that those “boring” “Normal” and “Regular” people generally are not as prone to do such things.
Yes playing with Fire can be so much fun. But IMHO the odds are against you.
You may get burned, or simply Disappear.
This video discusses “Lack of Object Constancy” which is another Trait and Red Flag of a Narcissist to watch for.
Video is courtesy of the Narcissistic Abuse Victim Syndrome YouTube channel
The video below is posted by someone suffering from Borderline Personality Disorder. She discusses a therapy session about Lack of Object Constancy. What she mentions, also applies to Narcissists. Note that she is actively seeking treatment via Therapy Sessions, which is something a Narcissist would rarely (if ever) do.
Video is courtesy of The Borderline Life YouTube channel
Posted to uniquelynarcissistic.wordpress.com
Are All Mental Illnesses Related?
David Kessler’s explanation of “Capture” could explain the formation and basis of Narcissism.
Who is David Kessler? He is the former Commissioner of the Food and Drug Administration.
His argument is that the process he refers to as “Capture”, is the “common mechanism” for all forms of Mental Illness and that it is based on the hard Wiring of the Brain and not on Chemical Imbalances.
David Kessler‘s view about “Capture“,correlates well with MRI Brain Scans of Narcissists and Psychopaths. Those Brain Scans show that their Brains react and process information differently than the general population.
Empathy lights up specific ares of a “more normal” Brain. Such does not happen with individuals with Cluster-B disorders. I have read that Brain Scans of Psychopaths indicate that areas of their Brains related to enjoyment light up when they view scenes of people being physically hurt or mutilated. Such never happens in the general population.
Because of specific hard wiring changes in the brains of say Narcissists, they in turn focus on selective stimuli – looking for and feeding off of Narcissistic Supply. The MRI Brains Scans also address why lack of empathy is a major Narcissistic trait and that it is directly tied to the way their Brain works.
If the video player does not start automatically, then plse click on the link below.
http://www.theatlantic.com/video/iframe/477918/ Video is courtesy of The Atlantic
There was also a radio interview with David Kessler on the Diane Rehm Show. In that interview, David goes into more fascinating detail about the idea of the process he called “Capture”.
Posted to uniquelynarcissistic.wordpress.com
This video is an intimate look back on a relationship with a Cerebral Narcissist. The presenter discusses her Cerebral Narcissist Husband as a textbook example.
She also details Narcissist’s issues with their “Mother”, which seem to be a common theme with Cerebral Narcissists.
Cerebral male narcissists tend to have moderate to severe ‘mother issues‘ where they have secretly-held or overtly-declared anger, disdain, and or generalized hurt originating from early childhood experiences from their mothers lack of attentive loving parenting. They tend to secretly dislike women.
You could feel the continued pain she still has, when she discussed her memory of being rejected sexually by her Husband.
Sex with a Cerebral Narcissist is controlled by the “Intimacy Factor”. Becoming “Intimate” with another person is something which Narcissists cannot do, especially Cerebral Narcissists (no Empathy for others, so Intimacy cannot be established). They much prefer viewing Porn and Masturbation, to having sex with a “real person”.
My addition to the last paragraph : If the person is providing a “High Grade/Quality” of Narcissistic Supply – ie someone who the Cerebral Narcissists looks up to, then the Narcissist will work hard at providing gratifying sex. Why? He will get a “High” from it, because “He was the super sex partner who “made possible” that great sex”. This will never happen to someone providing “Low Grade/Quality” of Narcissistic Supply. Please view a past post which provides more detail about this important aspect of a Sexual Experience with a Cerebral Narcissist: https://uniquelynarcissistic.wordpress.com/2016/01/25/sex-with-a-narcissist-is-all-about-how-the-narcissist-views-the-quality-of-the-source-of-narcissistic-supply
Video is courtesy of the Cluster B & Me YouTube channel