Somatic Narcissists come across as being Laid back. Somatic Narcs it seems lack education, focus, goals and drive and as such achieve little. They are generally low level employees.
Cerebral Narcissist, on the other hand, do climb high up the Corporate Ladder. They can also cause major problems for the firm. Their focus is on themselves and getting praise from those whom they have classified as “high quality” Narcissistic Supply. They generally have no clue how to motivate a Team and as such can lose really good employees who will quit.
I have crossed paths with Cerebral Narcs who were totally focused on themselves. Every conversation and every meeting included them praising themselves. People further up the ladder had a disdain for them and their further advancement up the Corporate Ladder was blocked. The only ones who could not see this were a couple of Flying Monkeys who would watch the Cerebral Narcs every move and follow and praise him.
Narcissists “need you” to praise and worship their every move. They can suffer Major Narcissistic Injury (potentially suicidal), if their “High Value” source of Narcissistic Supply goes No Contact.
So on one hand Narcissists think that they are Perfect. On the other they “need” others to confirm their “illusion” of perfection. Winners live in the real world. In my opinion, the Abandonment Trauma which created the Narcissist when they were just a Baby, did not create a Winner…
Video is courtesy of the Sam Vaknin YouTube channel
This video is an intimate look back on a relationship with a Cerebral Narcissist. The presenter discusses her Cerebral Narcissist Husband as a textbook example.
She also details Narcissist’s issues with their “Mother”, which seem to be a common theme with Cerebral Narcissists.
Cerebral male narcissists tend to have moderate to severe ‘mother issues‘ where they have secretly-held or overtly-declared anger, disdain, and or generalized hurt originating from early childhood experiences from their mothers lack of attentive loving parenting. They tend to secretly dislike women.
You could feel the continued pain she still has, when she discussed her memory of being rejected sexually by her Husband.
Sex with a Cerebral Narcissist is controlled by the “Intimacy Factor”. Becoming “Intimate” with another person is something which Narcissists cannot do, especially Cerebral Narcissists (no Empathy for others, so Intimacy cannot be established). They much prefer viewing Porn and Masturbation, to having sex with a “real person”.
My addition to the last paragraph : If the person is providing a “High Grade/Quality” of Narcissistic Supply – ie someone who the Cerebral Narcissists looks up to, then the Narcissist will work hard at providing gratifying sex. Why? He will get a “High” from it, because “He was the super sex partner who “made possible” that great sex”. This will never happen to someone providing “Low Grade/Quality” of Narcissistic Supply. Please view a past post which provides more detail about this important aspect of a Sexual Experience with a Cerebral Narcissist: https://uniquelynarcissistic.wordpress.com/2016/01/25/sex-with-a-narcissist-is-all-about-how-the-narcissist-views-the-quality-of-the-source-of-narcissistic-supply
Video is courtesy of the Cluster B & Me YouTube channel
To Narcissist there are two kinds of Sources of Narcissist Supply. They will feed off a Low Grade/Quality Source, when they can’t manage to trap a High Grade/Quality Source of Narcissistic Supply.
The Narcissist is the Standard used to judge the quality of their Source of Narcissistic Supply.
If the Supply Source is better Educated (this is major consideration with “Cerebral Narcissists“) then it is deemed to be a High Grade/Quality Source. If you make more money or have a higher job title, then again you are deemed to be a Good High Grade/Quality Source of Supply. If you are physically better looking, then again you are a High Grade/Quality Source of Supply.
Being classified as a High Grade/Quality Source of Narcissistic Supply guarantees really awesome sex. The Narcissist wants to impress such a sex partner. They will get a rush if they can sexually impress a High Grade/Quality Source of Narcissistic Supply. Narcissists always look up to people whom they consider to be a good High Grade/Quality Source of Supply.
On the opposite end of the stick is what Narcissists classify as a Bad or Poor, Low Grade/Quality Source of Narcissist Supply. This type or person will not be someone whom the Narcissist will ever look up to. Such a person will likely be far less educated (again a major big deal with Cerebral Narcissists) than the Narcissist. The person will earn far less money. They will have a much lower job title. This is the type of person that the Narcissist disdains. But since a High Grade/Quality Source of Supply is unavailable, they will feed off the Low Grade/Quality Source.
Since they do not look up to and actually have a disdain for such a Low Grade/Quality Source, the Sex will be far from satisfactory. To a Narcissist, Sex with a Low Grade/Quality Source of Supply is not much different than Masturbation.
To top things off the Narcissist will then complain to the Low Grade/Quality Source of Supply, that it was the Source’s fault for the lousy sex. It takes two to Tango, but the Narcissist could care less to Tango in this case. The Low Grade/Quality Source of Supply ends up with a lowered sense of self after such sex. Perfect for the Narcissist, because it makes the Low Grade Source of Supply easier to further manipulate.