Category: Narcissistic Love versus Unconditional Love

Love Bombing insights from the Trenches

Must view video filled with insights about Love Bombing and other Red Flags.

Her new Lover was talking about Marriage very shortly after their first meeting. This woman became so Psychologically Manipulated by the Love Bombing, that she bought her Wedding Dress within the first 2 weeks of meeting that new Lover. Classic Love Bombing and Major Red Flag. Love Bombing worked faster than Brain Washing / Mind Control techniques. The new Lover was in the mean time also seeing another woman.

The person Love Bombing you, is also Mirroring you. That establishes a very deep rapport and trust in the mind of the victim being Psychologically Manipulated. That deep Rapport and Trust is something which keeps physical Abuse Victim in Abusive Relationship.

The Victim dismisses being kicked down a fight of stairs and reminds herself of the beginning of the relationship when the Love Bombing and Mirroring were going on at full speed. She tells herself that he was so sweet and so charming and amazing and so lovable. The fact that he now punches her in the head multiple times and gives her Black Eyes on a regular basis, does not dislodge the Mind Control established during the Love Bombing phase. The abuse is dismissed because she is still “in Love” with the fake Persona she met during the Love Bombing phase.

Love Bombing is not about Love. Love Bombing is strictly about establishing Control over the Victim.

Video is courtesy of the Truthball In Search of Goof YouTube channel

One thing to note is how this woman kept attracting Disordered Individuals. Christine De Canonville noted in a seminar that once you have been with a Disordered Individual, you have been primed and other Disordered Individuals will spot you in a crowd and target you.

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A Narcissist’s Love is when the other person’s happiness is so unimportant, that it is never even considered.

Quote "A Narcissist's Love is when the other person's happiness is so unimportant, that it is never even considered." by uniquelynarcissistic.wordpress.com

Quote “A Narcissist’s Love is when the other person’s happiness is so unimportant, that it is never even considered.”

 

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A Narcissist Loves you as much as a non-Narcissist would Love their Toaster

Quote " A ANrcissist Loves you, as much as a non-Narcissist would love their Toaster." by uniquelynarcissistic.wordpress.com

Quote “A Narcissist Loves you, as much as a non-Narcissist would love their Toaster”

The above framed quote is actually a photo – JPG file.
Copyright 2016 https://uniquelynarcissistic.wordpress.com
Feel free to share under Creative Common License Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International

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This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International License.
UPDATE; May 15 2016 – redid

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“Christine Louis de Canonville” new workshop titled “UNDERSTANDING THE SELF-ABSORBED NARCISSISTIC MOTHER”

UPDATE Feb 16 2016Repaired all the links in this post. They now work again and take you to Christine’s site. Not sure what happened, but they do work now.

New Workshop On Narcissistic Mothers – The 26th February 2016
It’s almost time for my 3rd workshop. It’s about narcissistic mothers and the effects on her children.

It’s called “Mommie Dearest” – UNDERSTANDING THE SELF-ABSORBED NARCISSISTIC MOTHER.Revealing the Narcissistic Mother:

A mature mother with normal, healthy maternal nurturing instincts is a woman who is selfless, validates and loves her children unconditionally. She parents her children with empathy, and attunes into their inner emotional life as she prepares them for independent living when the time comes for them to leave the nest.

A narcissistic mother, on the other hand, is the antithesis of the mother I described above.  She is a mother who, instead of nurturing her children, is self-centred and mainly focused on herself. Rather than taking care of herself, the narcissistic mother expects to be taken care of by her children.

She neither trusts her children, nor believes in their basic goodness. She is brittle, controlling, does not observe boundaries, never apologizes or remembers her inappropriate behaviour, needs to be always right, will fly into rages, and project that anger onto her children.

She frightens her children, and discourages their independence. She needs to be the centre of attention, and is jealous if the children get attention from others. Her children are mere objects who represent her and show her in good light, but at the same time she is envious of their accomplishments, gifts and talents.

Her punishment is inconsistent and punitive, and she often uses the threat of abandonment to control them. All of this craziness serves to confuse her children and undermine their self esteem.  Of course, to the outside world everything is perfect, but behind closed doors the child is exposed to the horror of dealing with a mother with a Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD).

If you are the child of a narcissistic mother, or if you are a therapist working with the adult children of a narcissistic mother, then you need to understand that you are dealing with the behaviours of a mother who acts from a different set of criteria than the regular healthy loving mother.  As you can imagine, this disordered kind of parenting creates significant emotional damage to the child.

 

You’ll find all the information HERE or the link below for more details & booking..

http://narcissisticbehavior.net/narcissistic-mother-workshop/

This workshop is being held in Dublin, Ireland on 26th February 2016.

6 CPD points are awarded to all therapists who attend.

Warmest regards.
Christine
http://narcissisticbehavior.net/

The 3 Faces Of Evil – Unmasking The full Spectrum Of Narcissistic Abuse

Copyright © 2016  Roadshow for Therapists, All rights reserved.

 

Posted to https://uniquelynarcissistic.wordpress.com
Disclaimer: Any Trademarks mentioned in this post are owned by the respective Trademark owner. Thanks go out to Christine Louis de Canonville for keeping us updated about her must attend workshops

Narcissists And Sex. What You Need To Know.

What you need to know why you never could satisfy a Narcissist sexually??

Ever wondered why you never looked good enough for your narcissist??

Ever wonder why your Narcissist blamed you, for not being turned on by you??

Video is courtesy of the Show Boundaries YouTube channel.

An interesting point is made in the video. Since Narcissists have no Empathy for others they cannot connect with another person on an emotional level. No Empathy translates into No Love. When you Love someone, Sex is not just a physical Act. Sex creates an emotional bond between lovers, but for Narcissists there is no emotional bond (except with themselves).

In another part of the video, she describe having sex while her Narcissistic partner never made any eye contact with her. The Narcissist kept looking up at the mirror on the ceiling and he maintained eye contact with “himself”.

The idea that Narcissists are bi-sexual is also mentioned. Having sex with someone of the same sex, is not unlike masturbating for the Narcissist. They see a reflection of their own body in their same sex partner. They will flip sexual orientation if rejected. Say if a male rejects a female Narcissist, then she could flip preference and work at acquiring a female source of Narcissistic Supply to have sex with.

Posted to https://uniquelynarcissistic.wordpress.com

Narcissists Do Not Love other people. Narcissists just use them.

Quote "Narcissists do not Love other people. Narcissists just use them." by Uniquely Narcissistic

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Giving Your Narcissist Ex-Partner His/Her Own Medicine

Follow the course of action discussed in the video below with great caution.

Trying to get back at a Narcissist for Using and Abusing you, can be “Dangerous“. The difference between Emotional Abuse and Extreme Physical Abuse is a very fine line, which could be crossed without warning when a Narcissist becomes enraged.

I “do not agree” with Randi Andretti’s video below. There is no need to take on such extreme risk. 

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A Narcissist “Loves you”, like the way that non-Narcissists love an appliance – like say a Toaster. Narcissistic Love is Superficial.

The quote below is from a post by Caroline van Kimmenade titled “Narcissistic Love versus Unconditional Love“.

Narcissistic love is more superficial. We love appliances, as long as they do what they are supposed to do. Who decides what they are supposed to do? We do. Similarly, narcissists decide what other people are supposed to do, and when expectations are not fulfilled the scene can be a lot like someone swearing at their computer for crashing. It’s not a love based on any core connection, it’s a love based on functionality. I don’t know about you, but I don’t exactly grieve when an appliance breaks down and I need to replace it (I might be upset about the cost and effort required for the replacement though).

Narcissists love their Targets, much like the way people love their appliances. If the appliance works the way we want them to, then great. If not, then we throw them out. When the Narcissistic Supply Source does not function as the Narcissist requires, then that person is thrown out by the Narcissist, like one would do with a defective appliance. No need for “Tears” in either case.

I agree with Joseph Burgo where he stated in an interview, that many Narcissists share abandonment when they were children. They were adopted out or they were moved to relatives to be taken care of (such as Grandparents). The child suffered a major trauma. The child felt that they were being Rejected and Abandoned.

Narcissists thus have a major fear of being rejected. Narcissists more often than not, also dislike highly (even Hate) their Mothers. Their Mother was a women and she rejected and abandoned them. This hate gets projected onto all other women.

Click on this line to visit Caroline van Kimmenade’s website called: “The Happy Sensitive” to read her post titled “Narcissistic Love versus Unconditional Love“.

I’ll try to contact Caroline to see if I can get permission to share more of her material, which is well worth reading.

First posted to https://uniquelynarcissistic.wordpress.com