Category: Red Flags of a Liar

Learn how to spot when someone is trying to Lie to you. By Susan Carnicero

Susan Carnicero had spent over 20 years performing interviews, interrogations and polygraph examinations, as a Security Specialist with the CIA.

She had also developed behavioral screening programs, that are used by the U.S. Federal Government.

Uniquely Narcissistic focuses on the Red Flags of Disordered Individuals.  One of the Red Flags and Traits of Narcissists (and also of Sociopaths and Psychopaths) is that they are Proficient Liars, because they get lots of practice.

Susan Carnicero’s discusses what to watch for, when someone is trying to Lie to you.

Video is courtesy of the Digiday YouTube channel

Susan Carnicero is also the author of  the book titled: “Get the Truth: Former CIA Officers Teach You How to Persuade Anyone to Tell All.

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Persistent Flattery is a major Red Flag of Disordered Individuals like Narcissists and Psychopaths.

Red Flags are important to watch for. Narcissists repeat their calculated behavior with each new Target. Learn about the Red Flags commonly displayed by Narcissists and then watch for them.

There is a world of difference between honest Flattery and Calculated Persistent Flattery.

If someone relatively new in your life is consistently flattering you, ask yourself what do they want. Make sure to watch for other Red Flags.

Video is courtesy of the Inner Integration YouTube channel

SPEED ATTRACTION. Making Someone Love You In 20 Minutes by David Snyder

David Snyder discusses Speed Attraction.

Narcissists and Psychopaths are really good at establishing Rapport and Trust with their Targets. They do this using techniques which are below most people’s radar. Mirroring is a major Psychological Mind Control Technique used by Narcissists. Therapists may also use Mirroring to establish Trust with their patients. Trust can be real and created via shared experience, or false Trust can be programmed into someone’s mind and they will have no clue that they were manipulated.

Video is courtesy of the David Snyder YouTube channel

There is a video featured in a post on this site, by a Harvard Grad named Leslie Morgan Steiner. She was targeted by a Narcissist. She was talked into moving and became isolated from friends and family. Once she was isolated the abuse started and moved to physical abuse.She was programmed not to discuss the abuse with others. In the video she spoke of being physically abused. She stated that at the time her focus was not on the person physically abusing her. Her mind was focused on the false persona presented to her at the beginning of their relationship.

Mirroring and Love Bombing by the Narcissist installs Rapport and Trust deep into the victim’s mind. Again, Leslie focused on the false person whom she had been programmed to fall in love with. Someone who “did not exist”. She dismissed the physical abuse and focused on the false persona. She was very highly educated, yet the Narcissist was able to get inside her mind and manipulate her.

Learning about and then watching for the Red Flags like Mirroring, can give one a clue into the type of individual one is interacting with.

Watch the video and listen carefully to the way that David interacts with the people at his seminar – especially the females. Listen to how he shifts his tonality. He draws the Target in and starts asking question after question. He repeats what he has been told by the Target. He draws the Target in. Narcissists will sound like David, when they interact with their Targets. It is very subtle, yet very powerful and IMHO very dangerous if you are the Target.

Another verbal tactic of the Narcissist is to continually combine the target and themselves in statements they make. Take this statement fed to a Target by a Narc “You don’t Love Me anymore. stated as a joke to counter something negative which the Target just said.  The Target laughs at the Narc’s statement and the Target’s state is changed. The Negative is thus removed from the Target’s mind. Narcs are really good at countering anything negative. Humor is non threatening and does not set off alarms. Yet the Narc’s stupid statement (given the situation where it had been used), clears the Target’s mind of negative thoughts.

The constant combination of “You” and “Me”, also helps to program a connection in the Target’s mind. All this flies below the radar and never sets off any alarms in the Target’s Mind. Next thing you know, the Target starts to feel that they have met their Soul Mate…

When you leave an abusive relationship, you enter into the world of Abuse Recovery. It will take time and it can be painful.

A first person account of going through Abuse Recovery. It will not be easy. Nor will it be any fun.

One key point from this video is that by hanging in there, you can reach the light at the end of that dark tunnel.

I believe that a lot of people need to view this video, to help them to understand the insanity which they had lived through. It’s also important to hear that you were not the only one who was targeted, used and abused by a Narcissist, Sociopath or Psychopath. It helps to listen to the Red Flags mentioned, which were found in the presenter’s Toxic Relationship

Videos like this one, take guts to make public. IMHO, videos like this one are Extremely Important.

Video is courtesy of the Angel Speaks YouTube channel

Cluster-B Disordered Individuals mess up many loving and caring people. This IMHO is the fault of the Educational Systems. Just as there are Sex Education classes, there should also be training about the Red Flags displayed by Cluster-B Disordered Individuals. Have videos such as this one, shown to every High School, College and University graduating group.

A friend ended up in a Hospital for months after the Malignant Narcissist that she had married, went into a rage. No one ever taught her about the Red Flags to look for. She married and was isolated from friends and family, by moving to another country. Becoming isolated and totally dependent on a Cluster-B Disordered individual opens the door to major physical abuse. All my friend had to talk to were the Flying Monkeys, that is the Malignant Narc’s family. She learned about the Red Flags, after major damage was done.

Spotting Emotional Manipulation

Has someone played with your emotions in the past?

Has someone hurt your feelings, but then turned it around and made it “Your Fault”?
Did you then feel guilty?

Really good presentation about Emotional Manipulation and how a Puppet Master trains someone into submission and silence.

If you see these Red Flags in your relationship, you may want to seek help and reconsider remaining in such an emotionally manipulative / abusive relationship.

Video is courtesy of the Angel Speaks YouTube channel

Love Bombing insights from the Trenches

Must view video filled with insights about Love Bombing and other Red Flags.

Her new Lover was talking about Marriage very shortly after their first meeting. This woman became so Psychologically Manipulated by the Love Bombing, that she bought her Wedding Dress within the first 2 weeks of meeting that new Lover. Classic Love Bombing and Major Red Flag. Love Bombing worked faster than Brain Washing / Mind Control techniques. The new Lover was in the mean time also seeing another woman.

The person Love Bombing you, is also Mirroring you. That establishes a very deep rapport and trust in the mind of the victim being Psychologically Manipulated. That deep Rapport and Trust is something which keeps physical Abuse Victim in Abusive Relationship.

The Victim dismisses being kicked down a fight of stairs and reminds herself of the beginning of the relationship when the Love Bombing and Mirroring were going on at full speed. She tells herself that he was so sweet and so charming and amazing and so lovable. The fact that he now punches her in the head multiple times and gives her Black Eyes on a regular basis, does not dislodge the Mind Control established during the Love Bombing phase. The abuse is dismissed because she is still “in Love” with the fake Persona she met during the Love Bombing phase.

Love Bombing is not about Love. Love Bombing is strictly about establishing Control over the Victim.

Video is courtesy of the Truthball In Search of Goof YouTube channel

One thing to note is how this woman kept attracting Disordered Individuals. Christine De Canonville noted in a seminar that once you have been with a Disordered Individual, you have been primed and other Disordered Individuals will spot you in a crowd and target you.

When you start to see multiple Red Flags displayed by someone new, believe them. Those Red Flags are trying to show you who that person really is.

Quote "When you start to see multiple Red Flags displayed by someone new, believe them. Those Red Flags are trying to show you who that person really is." by uniquelynarcissistic.wordpress.com

Quote:When you start to see multiple Red Flags displayed by someone new, believe them. Those Red Flags are trying to show you who that person really is.

 

The above framed quote is actually a photo – JPG file.
Copyright 2016 https://uniquelynarcissistic.wordpress.com
Feel free to share under Creative Common License Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International

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Disordered Individuals are Proficient Liars.

Quote "Disordered individuals ae Proficient Liars. Seeing Multiple Red Flags may give you some insight, if you are interacting with a portentially Disordered Individual." uniquelynarcissistic.wordpress.com

Quote:Disordered Individuals are Proficient Liars. Seeing Multiple Red Flags may give you some insight, if you are interacting with a potentially Disordered Individual.

 

The above framed quote is actually a photo – JPG file.
Copyright 2016 https://uniquelynarcissistic.wordpress.com
Feel free to share under Creative Common License Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International

Creative Commons License
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International License.

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Animals do not physically abuse one another, as some Disordered Humans will Physically Abuse the person that Loves them more than anyone else on the face of this Earth.

You do not know when someone is keeping silent about the Abuse they are receiving from their Life Partner.

I believe that if the Abused Victim starts telling people about what is being done to them, then people will try to help them. Speaking about the abuse is the first important step to becoming free of it. They need Help taking that first step. Not a put down. Their Abuser has programmed into their Mind to “Do not tell”.

I was amazed at how well Love Bombing worked, especially how deep into the mind of the Victim it went. I had never before considered Love Bombing to be another approach to Mind Control and Mind Programming. The females who were being physically abused, focused on the person that they met during the Love Bombing phase. That was who they lived with, an Imaginary Persona. That is major Psychological Manipulation, yet it was accomplished easily and without stealth.

The battered and abused women were “very highly educated” and high income earners. Yet the educational system failed them, by not informing them of the Red Flags given off by Disordered individuals. They were Love Bombed and had no clue what was happening. They were then isolated from friends and family and had no clue what was being done to them. Major Red Flags, which they knew nothing about. Once you are committed to a relationship and the Abuse starts, it’s too late to be looking for Red Flags. You’ll be too busy looking at the red welts and bruises all over your body.

They could not mentally connect the person physically abusing them, with the imaginary person that they were exposed to at the very beginning of the relationship. The Abuser is able to establish a disconnect with reality. That is the result of Trauma Bonding. Victims feel the Abuser punching them in the head, but dismiss it and focus on that he was such a Prince Charming when we met.

The next few days after the physical abuse, the Abuser may pretend to be remorseful and state that it will never happen again. This cycle of dreadful physical violence followed by BS acts of Love and Kindness, messes up the Brain Chemistry of the Victim and establishes Trauma Bonding.  Some victims are made to think that they were at fault and deserved to have been beaten by the Abuser.

Animals do not physically abuse one another, as some Disordered Humans will physically abuse the person that Loves them more than anyone else on the face of this Earth. That Physical Abuse will be repeated and repeated without an end it site (up to the death of the Victim).

What an incredibly Horrible way for the Victims of Domestic Violence to live. Little did that beautiful newborn baby know what crap life had in store for it, when it grew up to be an adult…

Learn about the Red Flags. Watch for them and hopefully you might not end up being a victim of ongoing Domestic Violence and Abuse…

3 missing women had met the same man online

Associated Press posted about this on Jun 25.

Click on this Link to visit the Associated Press website to read their post titled: “Arizona authorities say 3 missing women met same man online

The latest woman to disappear introduced the male to her daughter, who immediately disliked him. The Daughter begged her Mom not to leave with the guy. (suggestion – don’t beg – call the Police)  Mom did not listen and has since “disappeared”. Two other women had previously apparently “disappeared”, after becoming involved with this guy

Interesting that the woman sold her home and closed her bank accounts. That means she was carrying a heck of a lot of cash. Why would your new lover want you to do this?

When the police finally figured out who the last woman had met, they found him living with another woman.

Key points that in my opinion are interesting.

Woman sells her home and closes all her bank accounts. I assume that she bought the RV and set to travel with this guy she met online. When you leave your friends and family you lose your support structure. With no support you are at the total mercy of the person who talked you into leaving everyone. This is a Red Flag – and  a Major One.

Seems that the woman was financing the whole thing. The guy contributed the idea to get her to leave her family and friends. Do not allow yourself to become isolated.

This is a major financial risk and venture. Talk to the Police and hire a Private Investigator to check out your new Love Interest. When the Police caught this guy, he had multiple fake IDs on him. Finger Prints proved that he was the guy that the Mother had left with.

It does not state that her daughter knew about the closing out the bank account. If it were my Mother in such a crazy situation, I would have called the Police and had hired a Private Detective to check this guy out. I would have embarrassed the hell out of the guy and gotten him and my Mother to visit the Police Station together with me. The Police can do some quick checks right away, but a complete check would take time. Mind you guy was finally caught by the Police with multiple Fake ID.

Here’s an idea, force the guy to get finger printed. Too bad if he gets pissed off. Better he gets pissed off, than having my Mother disappear after leaving with some guy she recently met on an internet dating site. It takes lots of time to get to know who you are with. Sometimes after decades people suddenly discover who they thought they were living with was just a fake persona. Disordered people have to move quickly to isolate their target, before their mask slips too much and more people realize how screwed up they are.

Also make sure to get lots of photographs of the guy and your Mother (using this case as an example). Get him to remove any hats or other head gear (motorcycle helmet for ex). Put the photos and finger prints into a Bank Safety Deposit Box so they can’t mysteriously disappear like the Mother had.

There is no valid reason to close one’s bank account, especially after having sold her house. Hint – another Red Flag. You want access to money, get an American Express Gold card and other companies offer similar things. That leaves signatures and witnesses. Leave very large amounts of money in a Bank or even in a bank Safety Deposit Box. It amazes me that the Mother got suckered into doing that. Bet ya the guy in this scenario contributed “not one dime”.

Another Red Flag is that when family members and friends show a distinct dislike for your new lover. That was mentioned in prior post about a TedX Talks video given by Alexandra Redcay. titled “Tips on selecting the Right Relationship by Alexandra Redcay“.

I’ve posted this line a few times “Just because someone smiles at you, does not mean that they are your friend“.

Here is a new variation “Just because someone tells you that they Love you, does not guarantee that they are not secretly planning to make you DISAPPEAR.“. Wake Up people…

Red Flags of a Liar. How to Spot a Liar by Pamela Meyer

This is another very good TED Talks. Pamela Meyer is the author of the book titled “Liespotting“.

She presents ways to recognize deception, ways to recognize the Red Flags of a Liar.

clues to detect those lies can be subtle and counter-intuitive

Pamela Meyers shows patterns of deception and details the clues. Clues like distancing and using more formal language. Clues like changes in Body Language.

Exceptional video filled with helpful detail to help one to recognize the Red Flags of Liars and to better recognize deception.

Video is courtesy of the TED YouTube channel

Click on this link to visit Pamela Meyer‘s website called Liespotting – Proven Techniques to spot desception.

>Click on this link to visit amazon.com to learn more about Pamela Meyer‘s book titled “Liespotting: Proven Techniques to Detect Deception.

Click on this link to visit the Liespotting facebook page.

Click on this link to visit the Google Books review of Liespotting, which also includes a few sample pages from the book.