Quote: “The best thing about your past relationship with a Narcissist, is that it’s over!“
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The story hit the AP Newswire. Because it’s copyrighted I can’t post it. There is already a YouTube video which has someone reading the AP report.
The Mail Online site did some further research and included photos of the female and her “ex”, which were not part of the AP News Feed.
Note the quote “didn’t accept being abandoned” (my quoting a few words out of hundreds for education purposes falls under “Fair Use” and I am quoting from the AP post). Interesting choice of words. It must be the victims fault. If she had not abandoned the guy, he would not have burned her alive. Somehow to them, it is always the fault of the victim.
In essence, the Ex followed the victim. Ran her car off the road. Got access to her car interior, while the victim was still in it. Poured alcohol into her car and lit it with a lighter. The victim left her now burning car. The Ex caught up to her. Threw alcohol at her head and lit it. She died from her burns. All that because the Ex “didn’t accept being abandoned”. He sure won her back, did he not.
Such a thing happening once, is one time too many. Yet this kind of thing sadly happens.
I know a female who takes a Taxi home after work, because she is scared of her ex following her if she walks home. That female was a major inspiration for me to setup this site. Her situation is a lot worse than the one in the news article. She’s been hospitalized for months at a time, thanks to her ex. Just imagine looking over your shoulder the rest of your life. Her ex is not just some regular ordinary office worker. She has a black belt in an Asian Martial Art. Her ex has had training way beyond that
People who have suffered Attachment and Abandonment Trauma when they were infants, can become very disordered adults. To suffer an Abandonment Trauma Event as a adult could send the person in two directions. One is to become suicidal over being abandoned. It is real, I’ve seen two somatic female Narcs go that route – both survived.
The other direction is to destroy the person who abandoned them (as in the news article). It comes down to the destruction of self or the other person. Someone has to pay, it’s either me or them. Disordered people have limited choices, especially those at the extreme end of disorders of Narcissism, and Sociopathy. Psychopaths, it is my understanding, would not suffer an Abandonment Trauma Event like say a Malignant Narcissist would. A Psychopath will kill you, because they want to kill you (no excuse needed to motivate them).
Learn the Red Flags to watch out for. If you don’t become involved with a Disordered individual, then you cannot abandon them. You become a non-issue to them, as they have a number of targets lined up to become potential sources of Narcissistic supply for example.
Click on this line to read the NY Post article about this event. The Mail Online article has more detail and photos – see the link further up in this post.
This video is complete webinar in which Steve Stokes, Clinical Practice Consultant, shares insights and practical guidance about Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder: The Effects of Developmental and Accumulative Trauma.
Who is Steve Stokes, you ask?
“Steve has been working in the Addictions and Mental Health Field for 27 years and runs Steve Stokes Counselling Services and Consulting. He is also the Clinical Program Consultant at South Pacific Private, Australia’s Leading Treatment Center in Curl Curl, N.S.W, Australia. In his Role he provides internal and external training at Conferences and Workshops as well as facilitating monthly Webinars for SPP.
Steve also has over 30 years personal Sobriety from Addiction in 12 step fellowships.Steve specializes in Developmental Trauma Treatment and Complex PTSD and Affect Regulation and it’s relationship to all Addiction Treatment. Steve specializes in Sex Addiction Treatment, Sex , Love and Avoidance addiction Treatment and co-occurring addictions and underlying Developmental Trauma.”
Video is courtesy of the South Pacific Private YouTube channel
This is a rather informative video. A Victim shares details from his 6 year long abusive relationship with a Somatic Narcissist.
It was surprising how this video essentially describes a Somatic Narcissist’s Playbook. Narcissists work from the same script, no matter where they live.
One interesting aspect of this video is that Mr. Smith is a Therapist, which goes to show that Narcissists can fool everyone. Narcissists really are amazing actors.
Video is courtesy of the familytreecounseling YouTube channel
You are a Survivor. Your Nightmare Abusive Relationship is thankfully over. All is well, then something minor happens which changes your State. All of a sudden you have an Emotional Flashback, which darkens your day.
After a Flashback, you may feel the urge to contact your emotional abuser. Stay safe, by staying “No Contact“. By staying “No Contact” there is no way of you being Hoovered back into the abusive relationship which you had left.
In the past your Narcissist, Sociopath or Psychopath had picked you as a viable Target. You are now even more vulnerable and they will be more determined to suck you back in and then punish you for leaving them.
You increase your recovery from an abusive relationship by staying “No Contact”.
Video is courtesy of the Narcissistic Abuse Victim Syndrome YouTube channel
When you break up with a Narcissist and they find out (yes they will keep tabs on you) that you have started dating someone else, often times the Narcissist will come running back to you. You were once their Source of Narcissistic Supply. Yes, they have a new Source of Narcissistic Supply, but the Narcissist fears losing you as a fallback option of Narcissistic Supply, when you start dating other people.
Talk to those who have broken up with a Narcissist and they will tell you that its never a good idea to fall for the empty promises of the Narcissist.
Video is courtesy of the Lisa A. Romano Breakthrough Life Coach YouTube channel
This video provides detailed answer to three questions:
1. Why Do Narcissists Cheat?
2. Why do Narcissists leave relationships?
3. Why or When do Narcissists Return or Come Back to the person they had dumped?
Video is courtesy of the Narcissist Free YouTube channel
The Narcissist Free YouTube channel is a superb resource about those who are afflicted with Narcissistic Personality Disorder and their Targeted Victims.
UPDATE Feb 16 2016 – Repaired all the links in this post. They now work again and take you to Christine’s site. Not sure what happened, but they do work now.
Posted to https://uniquelynarcissistic.wordpress.com
Disclaimer: Any Trademarks mentioned in this post are owned by the respective Trademark owner. Thanks go out to Christine Louis de Canonville for keeping us updated about her must attend workshops
“Psychopathy ….When The Mask Begins to Slip” featuring “Sandra L. Brown“ and host Jenna Stauffer.
Video is courtesy of the Jenna Stauffer YouTube channel
Sandra L. Brown, M.A., is the founder of The Institute for Relational Harm Reduction & Public Pathology Education. Her books include: How to Spot a Dangerous Man Before You Get Involved, the award winning Women Who Love Psychopaths: Inside the Relationships of Inevitable Harm With Psychopaths, Sociopaths & Narcissists, as well as the clinically relevant Counseling Victims of Violence: A Handbook for Helping Professionals.
Lifting the veil on Psychopaths and Psychopathy. “It’s just business”, no need for feelings. This video really nails it…
The Slandering Narcissist