Red Flags are important to watch for. Narcissists repeat their calculated behavior with each new Target. Learn about the Red Flags commonly displayed by Narcissists and then watch for them.
There is a world of difference between honest Flattery and Calculated Persistent Flattery.
If someone relatively new in your life is consistently flattering you, ask yourself what do they want. Make sure to watch for other Red Flags.
Video is courtesy of the Inner Integration YouTube channel
I find the Leyla Loric’s Narcissistic Abuse Victim Syndrome YouTube channel to have a unique way of explaining that which is complex in their videos.
In the video below she outlines, in an easy to understand manner, how Trauma Bonding happens.
Video is courtesy of the Narcissistic Abuse Victim Syndrome YouTube channel
The repeating of the connection and disconnection. The Push followed by the Pull. Richard Bandler‘s NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming) sheds some light on this. Love Bombing and Trauma Bonding both create major bonds between the Narcissist Abuser and his/her Victim. I’ll try to post something about that at a later date.
Briefly, I believe (your mileage may differ) Love Bombing and Trauma Bonding covertly put the Victim into a Deep Trance State.
It is a sign of Major Mind Control, when a women gets kicked down a flight of stairs, yet will not leave such an abusive relationship. Why? Because the women will tell you that they are still “in Love” with the abuser. Actually they mention the person they met at the start of the Love Bombing phase. The Fake Persona they were fed.
In my opinion, (your mileage may differ) victims of major physical abuse are not in Love with their Abuser. They have been repeatedly Anchored to go into a Deep Hypnotic Trance State, where they have been programmed to experience a huge rapport with the Abuser.
The black eyes and broken bones hurt far less than having to exit that Deep Hypnotic Trance State. Not unlike a heavy drug addiction to say Heroin. It is only when Victims leave such abusive relationships and those anchors and triggers are no longer fired off, that they can see the reality about their Abuser.
Police wearing body cameras capture the result of a horrific beating a woman had received. Because of the body camera video, the husband who beat his wife was charged and convicted and is now serving a 10 year jail sentence.
Yes he is in jail, but has justice been served? He gets free Room and Board for 10 years, with 3 meals a day cooked for him. Just look at the woman’s face in the screen capture pic. She had been getting this kind of abuse for 10 years. Absolutely sickening.
Is the photo below showing you, your future?Photo of Gale Marmoy is a screen capture (which we made) from the Police video
Her husband had apparently been beating this woman for about a decade before being convicted. Clear example of Trauma Bonding or Stockholm Syndrome on the part of the victim.
If you are presently in an abusive relationship, then seek out the Police and your Health Care Professionals to help you to get out of that abusive relationship before it “Kills You“.
Abuse is real. Being abused is not the fault of the victim. Trauma Bonding is very real, but those bonds can be broken with the help of your Medical Professionals.
No one deserves to be abused.
Watch the video to see how cool he was when the Police arrived at his door after he beat his wife. IMHO he displayed Psychopathic traits. It was bizarre how he calmly asked his wife (whom he called Dawn) if she wanted to speak to the Police. It was as if nothing had happened to give a reason for the Police to have shown up. As if he had done nothing wrong. If the Police had not come, he was not going to call his wife an ambulance or take her to the hospital.
What kind of person could be so Heartless and lacking in Empathy, to behave in this manner? Well lets see, a Malignant Narcissist in a rage and of course a Psychopath could do extreme damage to someone in the blink of an eye. Afterwards they could even blame the victim. Such disordered individuals lack Empathy for the suffering of others.
It boggles my mind how someone could do something like this, yet sadly it happens all too often.
Video is courtesy of the OfficialHantsPolice YouTube channel
Your Brain on Love, Sex and the Narcissist: The Addiction to Bonding with our Abusers
by Shahida Arabi
*If you enjoy this post, please consider supporting Self-Care Haven by purchasing the e-book version of this article, which is an extended and more in-depth look into these biochemical bonds. All proceeds will go towards services for survivors. If you were inspired by this article and would like to write about about this perspective, please be sure to link back to the article. Thank you!
April 27, 2015
Many survivors of narcissistic abuse are confounded by the addiction they feel to the narcissist, long after the abusive relationship took a toll on their physical, mental, and emotional well-being. Make no mistake: recovery from an abusive relationship can be very similar to withdrawal from drug addiction due to the biochemical bonds we may develop with our toxic ex-partners.
Understanding why we are…
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Trauma Bonding or Stockholm Syndrome can occur when the abused individual is made to go thru alternating Reward / Punishment cycles. A simple act of kindness during an abusive situation, can mess up the victim’s brain chemistry. The kindness event is short lived, as the abuser goes back into Narcissistic Abuse mode. Unfortunately for the victim of the abuse, a Trauma Bond may have started to form.
Very well presented video about Trauma Bonding, which at first establishes what Stockholm Syndrome and Trauma Bonding is. Then details the Reward Punishment cycle, which is used to “hook you”.
Video is courtesy of the Inner Integration YouTube channel
Video is courtesy of the Annabel Lee YouTube channel
Recovering from a Heroin Addiction is said to be easier to do, than to recover from Abusive Relationship with a Narcissist, if Trauma Bonding has occurred.
Video is courtesy of the Sacha Slone YouTube channel
Sacha Slone discusses brain chemicals which could help keep the Victim of Narcissistic Abuse conditioned to remain in the relationship, not unlike a Drug Addiction. The biochemicals in the brain may also help create Trauma Bonding or Stockholm Syndrome.
The helplessness is learned, over time, using the Biochemistry created by using Reward and Punishment. Victims are trained to become dependent on the Narcissist. People outside of the abusive relationship can never understand why the Victim cannot leave such a relationship.