Category: Trauma Bonding caused by Brain Chemistry

Trauma Bonding. When you can not let go of the Narcissist.


Video is courtesy of the Inner Integration YouTube channel.

Trauma Bonding (also known as Stockholm Syndrome) can keep you in an abusive relationship with a Narcissist.

Meredith Miller also touches on something very important, that being the core wound which was created during your childhood.

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Persistent Flattery is a major Red Flag of Disordered Individuals like Narcissists and Psychopaths.

Red Flags are important to watch for. Narcissists repeat their calculated behavior with each new Target. Learn about the Red Flags commonly displayed by Narcissists and then watch for them.

There is a world of difference between honest Flattery and Calculated Persistent Flattery.

If someone relatively new in your life is consistently flattering you, ask yourself what do they want. Make sure to watch for other Red Flags.

Video is courtesy of the Inner Integration YouTube channel

Trauma Bonding explains why it is so hard to leave an Abusive Relationship

I find the Leyla Loric’s Narcissistic Abuse Victim Syndrome YouTube channel to have a unique way of explaining that which is complex in their videos.

In the video below she outlines, in an easy to understand manner, how Trauma Bonding happens.

Video is courtesy of the Narcissistic Abuse Victim Syndrome YouTube channel

The repeating of the connection and disconnection. The Push followed by the Pull. Richard Bandler‘s NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming) sheds some light on this. Love Bombing and Trauma Bonding both create major bonds between the Narcissist Abuser and his/her Victim. I’ll try to post something about that at a later date.

Briefly, I believe (your mileage may differ) Love Bombing and Trauma Bonding covertly put the Victim into a Deep Trance State.

It is a sign of Major Mind Control, when a women gets kicked down a flight of stairs, yet will not leave such an abusive relationship. Why? Because the women will tell you that they are still “in Love” with the abuser. Actually they mention the person they met at the start of the Love Bombing phase. The Fake Persona they were fed.

In my opinion, (your mileage may differ) victims of major physical abuse are not in Love with their Abuser. They have been repeatedly Anchored to go into a Deep Hypnotic Trance State, where they have been programmed to experience a huge rapport with the Abuser.

The black eyes and broken bones hurt far less than having to exit that Deep Hypnotic Trance State. Not unlike a heavy drug addiction to say Heroin. It is only when Victims leave such abusive relationships and those anchors and triggers are no longer fired off, that they can see the reality about their Abuser.

Trauma Bonding & the Narcissist – Nobody Does it Better!

Feeling attached to a narcissist or sociopath even though he treats us badly is a constant source of angst for those in recovery from toxic relationships.

Source: Trauma Bonding & the Narcissist – Nobody Does it Better!

This post is courtesy of the thenarcissisticpersonality.com website. Plse visit their site and check out their other great posts.

When You Love Your Abuser: Stockholm Syndrome and Trauma Bonds

They say that when you get burned by fire you don’t put your hand in the hot oven again. But that’s not necessarily the case. Sometimes, it’s the fact of being burned that emotion…

Source: When You Love Your Abuser: Stockholm Syndrome and Trauma Bonds

This post is courtesy of psychopathyawareness.wordpress.com. Please visit their extremely informative site by clicking on this line.

After they Isolate you, then they can start the Physical Abuse

Click on this Link to visit the Healthy Place website to read their post titled “Isolation and Domestic Abuse: How Abusers Isolate Victims“.

The most striking thing about Physical Abuse is that victims were first “Isolated”.They moved out of New York City to some small town. They moved to a remote cottage. They married and lived in another part of the country, away from the Victim’s family and Friends. The Victim was emotionally restrained from going away to visit with Friends and Family. The Victim’s Father was dying in the Hospital and yet the Abuser would not let the Victim leave to be with her Father.

Abusers cannot control a Victim from a distance. Abusers maintain their power and control over the Victim, by enforcing the Victim’s silence. If the Victim visits their family, they might speak of the horrors being done to the Victim. Once the abuse is out in the open, the Abuser starts to lose much of the power and control over their Victim.

The abuser will present tons of semi logical excuses for moving the Victim away from their Family and Friends. They will start a new life together…BS…more BS…some more BS….and even more BS.

When the Victim has no one else to help her, she becomes totally dependent on the Abuser. To make the situation worse, the Abuser may become the sole income earner. Rather hard to leave when you have no money.

Isolation is a Major Red Flag. If you do not allow yourself to become isolated, then you will not become dependent on your Lover and potential abuser. Note that the abuse does not start until the victim has been isolated.

Learn about the Red Flags displayed by Disordered Individuals. Then watch for them.

The more Red Flags that you spot, the more questions you should have of the individual displaying those Red Flags.

Animals do not physically abuse one another, as some Disordered Humans will Physically Abuse the person that Loves them more than anyone else on the face of this Earth.

You do not know when someone is keeping silent about the Abuse they are receiving from their Life Partner.

I believe that if the Abused Victim starts telling people about what is being done to them, then people will try to help them. Speaking about the abuse is the first important step to becoming free of it. They need Help taking that first step. Not a put down. Their Abuser has programmed into their Mind to “Do not tell”.

I was amazed at how well Love Bombing worked, especially how deep into the mind of the Victim it went. I had never before considered Love Bombing to be another approach to Mind Control and Mind Programming. The females who were being physically abused, focused on the person that they met during the Love Bombing phase. That was who they lived with, an Imaginary Persona. That is major Psychological Manipulation, yet it was accomplished easily and without stealth.

The battered and abused women were “very highly educated” and high income earners. Yet the educational system failed them, by not informing them of the Red Flags given off by Disordered individuals. They were Love Bombed and had no clue what was happening. They were then isolated from friends and family and had no clue what was being done to them. Major Red Flags, which they knew nothing about. Once you are committed to a relationship and the Abuse starts, it’s too late to be looking for Red Flags. You’ll be too busy looking at the red welts and bruises all over your body.

They could not mentally connect the person physically abusing them, with the imaginary person that they were exposed to at the very beginning of the relationship. The Abuser is able to establish a disconnect with reality. That is the result of Trauma Bonding. Victims feel the Abuser punching them in the head, but dismiss it and focus on that he was such a Prince Charming when we met.

The next few days after the physical abuse, the Abuser may pretend to be remorseful and state that it will never happen again. This cycle of dreadful physical violence followed by BS acts of Love and Kindness, messes up the Brain Chemistry of the Victim and establishes Trauma Bonding.  Some victims are made to think that they were at fault and deserved to have been beaten by the Abuser.

Animals do not physically abuse one another, as some Disordered Humans will physically abuse the person that Loves them more than anyone else on the face of this Earth. That Physical Abuse will be repeated and repeated without an end it site (up to the death of the Victim).

What an incredibly Horrible way for the Victims of Domestic Violence to live. Little did that beautiful newborn baby know what crap life had in store for it, when it grew up to be an adult…

Learn about the Red Flags. Watch for them and hopefully you might not end up being a victim of ongoing Domestic Violence and Abuse…

Domestic abuse survivor speaks out to help victims

Police wearing body cameras capture the result of a horrific beating a woman had received. Because of the body camera video, the husband who beat his wife was charged and convicted and is now serving a 10 year jail sentence.

Yes he is in jail, but has justice been served? He gets free Room and Board for 10 years, with 3 meals a day cooked for him. Just look at the woman’s face in the screen capture pic. She had been getting this kind of abuse for 10 years. Absolutely sickening.

Is the photo below showing you, your future?photo of a female victim of domestic abuse with both eyes blackedPhoto of Gale Marmoy is a screen capture (which we made) from the Police video

Her husband had apparently been beating this woman for about a decade before being convicted. Clear example of Trauma Bonding or Stockholm Syndrome on the part of the victim.

If you are presently in an abusive relationship, then seek out the Police and your Health Care Professionals to help you to get out of that abusive relationship before it “Kills You“.

Abuse is real. Being abused is not the fault of the victim. Trauma Bonding is very real, but those bonds can be broken with the help of your Medical Professionals.

No one deserves to be abused.

Watch the video to see how cool he was when the Police arrived at his door after he beat his wife. IMHO he displayed Psychopathic traits. It was bizarre how he calmly asked his wife (whom he called Dawn) if she wanted to speak to the Police. It was as if nothing had happened to give a reason for the Police to have shown up. As if he had done nothing wrong.  If the Police had not come, he was not going to call his wife an ambulance or take her to the hospital.

What kind of person could be so Heartless and lacking in Empathy, to behave in this manner? Well lets see, a Malignant Narcissist in a rage and of course a Psychopath could do extreme damage to someone in the blink of an eye. Afterwards they could even blame the victim. Such disordered individuals lack Empathy for the suffering of others.

It boggles my mind how someone could do something like this, yet sadly it happens all too often.

Video is courtesy of the OfficialHantsPolice YouTube channel

Click on this line to read a news article about the events discussed in the video above.

Special Thanks go out to Christine Louis De Canonville who’s Google Plus page spoke about this event.

Your Brain on Love, Sex and the Narcissist: The Addiction to Bonding with Our Abusers

Self-Care Haven by Shahida Arabi

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Your Brain on Love, Sex and the Narcissist: The Addiction to Bonding with our Abusers  

by Shahida Arabi 

*If you enjoy this post, please consider supporting Self-Care Haven by purchasing the e-book version of this article, which is an extended and more in-depth look into these biochemical bonds. All proceeds will go towards services for survivors. If you were inspired by this article and would like to write about about this perspective, please be sure to link back to the article. Thank you!

 April 27, 2015 

Many survivors of narcissistic abuse are confounded by the addiction they feel to the narcissist, long after the abusive relationship took a toll on their physical, mental, and emotional well-being. Make no mistake: recovery from an abusive relationship can be very similar to withdrawal from drug addiction due to the biochemical bonds we may develop with our toxic ex-partners.

Understanding why we are…

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Stockholm Syndrome or Trauma Bonding In Narcissistic Abuse

Trauma Bonding or Stockholm Syndrome can occur when the abused individual is made to go thru alternating Reward / Punishment cycles. A simple act of kindness during an abusive situation, can mess up the victim’s brain chemistry. The kindness event is short lived, as the abuser goes back into Narcissistic Abuse mode. Unfortunately for the victim of the abuse, a Trauma Bond may have started to form.

Very well presented video about Trauma Bonding, which at first establishes what Stockholm Syndrome and Trauma Bonding is. Then details the Reward Punishment cycle, which is used to “hook you”.

Video is courtesy of the Inner Integration YouTube channel

 

Click on this line to view our prior posts about Trauma Bonding and Stockholm Syndrome.

How Do I Stop Thinking about the Narcissist?

Video is courtesy of the Annabel Lee YouTube channel

“Trauma Bonding” with a Narcissist, could be harder to break than a Heroin Addiction.

Recovering from a Heroin Addiction is said to be easier to do, than to recover from Abusive Relationship with a Narcissist, if Trauma Bonding has occurred.

Sacha Slone discusses Trauma Bonding, which is something that could happen to Victims of Narcissistic Abuse.

Video is courtesy of the Sacha Slone YouTube channel

Sacha Slone discusses brain chemicals which could help keep the Victim of Narcissistic Abuse conditioned to remain in the relationship, not unlike a Drug Addiction. The biochemicals in the brain may also help create Trauma Bonding or Stockholm Syndrome.

The helplessness is learned, over time, using the Biochemistry created by using Reward and Punishment. Victims are trained to become dependent on the Narcissist.  People outside of the abusive relationship can never understand why the Victim cannot leave such a relationship.