Somatic Narcissists come across as being Laid back. Somatic Narcs it seems lack education, focus, goals and drive and as such achieve little. They are generally low level employees.
Cerebral Narcissist, on the other hand, do climb high up the Corporate Ladder. They can also cause major problems for the firm. Their focus is on themselves and getting praise from those whom they have classified as “high quality” Narcissistic Supply. They generally have no clue how to motivate a Team and as such can lose really good employees who will quit.
I have crossed paths with Cerebral Narcs who were totally focused on themselves. Every conversation and every meeting included them praising themselves. People further up the ladder had a disdain for them and their further advancement up the Corporate Ladder was blocked. The only ones who could not see this were a couple of Flying Monkeys who would watch the Cerebral Narcs every move and follow and praise him.
Narcissists “need you” to praise and worship their every move. They can suffer Major Narcissistic Injury (potentially suicidal), if their “High Value” source of Narcissistic Supply goes No Contact.
So on one hand Narcissists think that they are Perfect. On the other they “need” others to confirm their “illusion” of perfection. Winners live in the real world. In my opinion, the Abandonment Trauma which created the Narcissist when they were just a Baby, did not create a Winner…
Video is courtesy of the Sam Vaknin YouTube channel
You will never know when the Somatic Narcissist’s Smear Campaign starts.
If you go No Contact, then expect the unexpected, especially in a place of employment. Not providing a Somatic Narcissist with the Attention (Narcissistic Supply) which they crave, can turn the Narcissist against you. They will inform upper management that they can’t stand working there because you are there. They will smear your reputation. If you ever find out about their Smear Campaign, it will be way too late for damage Control. All that just because you decided to stay the hell away from them and go As Little As Possible to No Contact.
Somatic Narcissists can become
the DESTROYERS of Your Reputation.
Cerebral Narcissists, I have found will not do that. They are smart enough to realize that you will not play their game and will either leave you alone or work to get you fired as soon as possible. Cerebral Narcissists are much further up the Corporate Ladder and “can” get you fired with little effort. No need for a long term Smear Campaign, which would be beneath them.
Somatic Narcissist in general are low level employees, who do not have the education and smarts to climb any Corporate Ladder. They use their physical appearance and superficial Charm to attract Targets.
Video is courtesy of the mfromcanada1 YouTube channel
A friend made an interesting comment. It was about a female Somatic Narcissist which we both know.
My friend made a comment that she was much like a Spider. She would create a fine Spider’s Web to trap you in. Once trapped she would do whatever she wanted to you.
She could be devilishly charming, always wanting to be the center of everyone’s attention. She made sure that everyone knew that she was there. She would work at trying to build you up. Love Bombing you with compliments and talk of being kindred spirits. Eventually the “Discard phase” would arrive with the backstabbing and smear campaign.
The idea of her being like a Spider was interesting.
Narcissists really are like Spiders. They build a web of lies and half truths, much like a Spider builds it’s Spider’s Web. Once they have their prey in their web, the Spider will feed off it. With the Narcissist you become a Source of Narcissistic Supply, which they will feed on. Eventually they find a new and to them better Source of Narcissistic Supply, so you get discarded. All that is left of a Spider’s prey is an empty shell. Survivors of narcissistic abuse will tell you that they are not the same person that they were before hooking up with their Narcissist.
Narcissists lack Empathy for others. Spiders also don’t care about the prey that they trap in their web. Both Spiders and Narcissists will happily Feed off their prey. Both Spiders and Narcissists are also always looking to trap more victims in their web.
My friend is not knowledgeable about the DSM-4 & 5 profile of people afflicted with Narcissistic Personality Disorder, but his analogy of referring to this female as being like a Spider was extraordinarily perceptive and in my opinion sadly dead on. She is clearly someone to stay the hell away from.
This is a rather informative video. A Victim shares details from his 6 year long abusive relationship with a Somatic Narcissist.
It was surprising how this video essentially describes a Somatic Narcissist’s Playbook. Narcissists work from the same script, no matter where they live.
One interesting aspect of this video is that Mr. Smith is a Therapist, which goes to show that Narcissists can fool everyone. Narcissists really are amazing actors.
Video is courtesy of the familytreecounseling YouTube channel
This is the first of two videos. It covers the the female Somatic Narcissist and the Antisocial Sociopath con artist Narcissist.
The Cluster B & Me YouTube channel is well worth visiting to view the many informative videos.
Video is courtesy of the Cluster B & Me YouTube channel
A well articulated and honest video discussing the differences between Somatic Narcissists and Cerebral Narcissists.
When two Narcissists get into a relationship (a Union made in Narcissistic Heaven), one is often Somatic while the other is Cerebral.That way they do not compete with each other for Narcissistic Supply. Each one can act a Source of Narcissistic Supply for the other.
The following was written by Dr. Sam Vaknin. It elaborates on the video above. Thanks go out to Dr. Sam Vaknin for allowing us to share this here.
Narcissists are either cerebral or somatic. In other words, they either generate their Narcissistic Supply by applying their bodies or by applying their minds.
The somatic narcissist flaunts his sexual conquests, parades his possessions, exhibits his muscles, brags about his physical aesthetics, youthfulness, sexual prowess or exploits, and is often a health freak and a hypochondriac. The somatic narcissist regards his body as an object to be sculpted and honed (via extreme diets, multiple cosmetic surgeries, bodybuilding, or weightlifting). When coupled with psychopathic tendencies, the somatic appropriates other people’s bodies and treats these as “raw materials” to be dismembered, tampered with, altered, invaded, or otherwise abused.
Somatic narcissists are often portrayed as sex addicts or histrionic. But really they derive their narcissistic supply not so much from the sex act as from the process of securing it: the conspiracies and assignations, the chase and conquest, the subjugation and habituation of their targets, and even from dumping and discarding their prey, once having extracted the attention and admiration they had sought. These extracurricular activities endow them with a sense of omnipotence and all-pervasive control. Their sway over their paramours and would-be lovers proves to them (and to others) their uniqueness, desirability and irresistibility.
The cerebral narcissist is a know-it-all, haughty and intelligent “computer”. He uses his awesome intellect, or knowledge (real or pretended) to secure adoration, adulation and admiration. To him, his body and its maintenance are a burden and a distraction.
Both types are auto-erotic (psychosexually in love with themselves, with their bodies and with their brain). Both types prefer masturbation to adult, mature, interactive, multi-dimensional and emotion-laden sex.
The cerebral narcissist is often celibate (even when he has a girlfriend or a spouse). He prefers pornography and sexual auto-stimulation to the real thing. The cerebral narcissist is sometimes a latent (hidden, not yet outed) homosexual.
The somatic narcissist uses other people’s bodies to masturbate. Sex with him – pyrotechnics and acrobatics aside – is likely to be an impersonal and emotionally alienating and draining experience. The partner is often treated as an object, an extension of the somatic narcissist, a toy, a warm and pulsating vibrator.
It is a mistake to assume type-constancy. In other words, all narcissists are BOTH cerebral and somatic. In each narcissist, one of the types is dominant. So, the narcissist is either OVERWHELMINGLY cerebral – or DOMINANTLY somatic. But the other type, the recessive (manifested less frequently) type, is there. It is lurking, waiting to erupt.
The narcissist swings between his dominant type and his recessive type. The latter is expressed mainly as a result of a major narcissistic injury or life crisis.
I can give you hundreds of examples from my correspondence but, instead, let’s talk about me (of course…:o))
This article appears in my book, “Malignant Self-love: Narcissism Revisited”
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I am a cerebral narcissist. I brandish my brainpower, exhibit my intellectual achievements, bask in the attention given to my mind and its products. I hate my body and neglect it. It is a nuisance, a burden, a derided appendix, an inconvenience, a punishment. Needless to add that I rarely have sex (often years apart). I masturbate regularly, very mechanically, as one would change water in an aquarium. I stay away from women because I perceive them to be ruthless predators who are out to consume me and mine.
I have had quite a few major life crises. I got divorced, lost millions a few times, did time in one of the worst prisons in the world, fled countries as a political refugee, was threatened, harassed and stalked by powerful people and groups. I have been devalued, betrayed, denigrated and insulted.
Invariably, following every life crisis, the somatic narcissist in me took over. I became a lascivious lecher. When this happened, I had a few relationships – replete with abundant and addictive sex – going simultaneously. I participated in and initiated group sex and mass orgies. I exercised, lost weight and honed my body into an irresistible proposition.
This outburst of unrestrained, primordial lust waned in a few months and I settled back into my cerebral ways. No sex, no women, no body.
These total reversals of character stun my mates. My girlfriends and spouse found it impossible to digest this eerie transformation from the gregarious, darkly handsome, well-built and sexually insatiable person that swept them off their feet – to the bodiless, bookwormish hermit with not an inkling of interest in either sex or other carnal pleasures.
I miss my somatic half. I wish I could find a balance, but I know it is a doomed quest. This sexual beast of mine will forever be trapped in the intellectual cage that is I, Sam Vaknin, the Brain.
Sin of self-love possesseth all mine eye
And all my soul and all my every part;
And for this sin there is no remedy,
It is so grounded inward in my heart.
Methinks no face so gracious is as mine,
No shape so true, no truth of such account;
And for myself mine own worth do define,
As I all other in all worths surmount.
But when my glass shows me myself indeed,
Beated and chopp’d with tann’d antiquity,
Mine own self-love quite contrary I read;
Self so self-loving were iniquity.
‘Tis thee, myself, that for myself I praise,
Painting my age with beauty of thy days.
(Sonnet 62, William Shakespeare)
Plac’d on this isthmus of a middle state,
A Being darkly wise, and rudely great:
With too much knowledge for the Sceptic side,
With too much weakness for the Stoic’s pride,
He hangs between; in doubt to act, or rest;
In doubt to deem himself a God, or Beast;
In doubt his mind or body to prefer;
Born but to die, and reas’ning but to err;
Alike in ignorance, his reason such,
Whether he thinks too little, or too much;
Chaos of Thought and Passion, all confus’d;
Still by himself, abus’d or disabus’d;
Created half to rise and half to fall;
Great Lord of all things, yet a prey to all,
Sole judge of truth, in endless error hurl’d;
The glory, jest and riddle of the world.
(Essay on Man, Alexander Pope)
Copyright (c) Dr. Sam Vaknin All Rights Reserved.
Posted on this site thanks to the express permission granted by Dr. Sam Vaknin.