Red Flags are important to watch for. Narcissists repeat their calculated behavior with each new Target. Learn about the Red Flags commonly displayed by Narcissists and then watch for them.
There is a world of difference between honest Flattery and Calculated Persistent Flattery.
If someone relatively new in your life is consistently flattering you, ask yourself what do they want. Make sure to watch for other Red Flags.
Video is courtesy of the Inner Integration YouTube channel
Dr. Martha Stout Ph.D, is the author of book titled “The Sociopath Next Door“. The Book Browse website has posted some really good insights by Martha Stout. They titled the post “An interview with Martha Stout“. It reads more like a good summary of Martha Stout’s thoughts, than an interview. In either case it is an interesting read.
In the post, under the section “Thirteen Rules for Dealing with Sociopaths in Everyday Life“, Martha Stout mentions what she calls the Rule of Threes. I’ll cut to the chase and bypass the first two events. This is what she concludes in her Rule of Threes: “But three lies says you’re dealing with a liar, and deceit is the linchpin of conscienceless behavior. Cut your losses and get out as soon as you can.“.
Flattery goes part and parcel with Love Bombing. I don’t have an inflated ego. If someone compliments me for something which I did, I’ll thank them. If they do it again, I’ll go “Huh?” to myself. When the compliments keep coming, I start questioning why is this person doing this. It is no longer flattering and I look for a motive.
That Martha Stout post touches on “Suspect Flattery“. The following is a good quote from Martha Stout about “Suspect flattery” : “It is the material of counterfeit charm, and nearly always involves an intent to manipulate.“.
The Book Browse post is full of helpful insights and is well worth reading. Martha Stout specializes in Sociopaths and her insights are targeted at Sociopathic behaviour. Pretty much everything which Martha Stout wrote to watch for, can apply equally well to Narcissists.